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tommorow so far.

December 28, 2009

Understand that today you will not be happy. Understand that you are here and that everyone else is not here. Understand that today you are almost completely alone in the world. Look at clock. Observe that is it half past one. Realise how dry and cracked your lips are. Sink further into self loathing at your inability to remember lip salve every single goddamn time you go into town. Attempt to cheer yourself up by making a large plate of pasta. Put pasta in a soup bowl instead of on a plate and feel smugly ‘continental’, consider chopsticks but realise that would be ‘going too far’. Feel better as you acknowledge your gift of being able to choose suitable music to suit any occasion. Listen to a dubstep song on youtube that sounds as if it was made by a paranoid schizophrenic living in a small quarry. Think ‘very apt’ and lie in foetal position on your bed looking at the window that you haven’t been able to open for two weeks now. Consider alternatives: breaking the glass of window, oiling the hinges of window, moving bed to other room where window opens easily. Cry. Make a cup of tea. Put on fresh pair of socks and look at the state of your nails. Ignore the state of your nails. Think ‘post-it notes’. Open new word document on laptop and being typing with your chin. Gghhgyuhjytuyr. Gthkjd. Sdkjgthn bhjkm,nmjf v bnnm n.bvmk, gmjk dc.

gvfd.

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